A New Man
by DoctorLia
Summary: Set after the Zeppo episode in Season 3. Xander decided he doesn't want to be a liability to the gang anymore. I suck at summarys, but the story is better I swear.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I don't own any thing from BtVS...although I wish I owned Xander. Anyway This chapter is short, but I swear the others will be longer. This takes place two weeks after The Zeppo episode.**

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Xander stood up and gave the group a once over before offering to get doughnuts. When they all agreed, Giles gave him a few bills and he walked out. Everyone, but Willow, went back to researching the demon that had attacked Buffy the night before. Willow's face took on a thoughtful expression as she stared at the double doors that Xander had just walked through. After a few moments her staring into space Oz decided to call her on it.

"You ok, Willow?" When Willow gave him a puzzled look he continued, "You've been staring at the entrance for a while now."

"Oh! Umm, I was just thinking…" She trailed off not really knowing how to word her concerns.

"Thinking 'bout what?" Buffy asked, happy that she had a distraction from the dusty books before her. As much as she wanted to find out what attacked her, she really wished that demons came with tags.

"Well…Have you…Is it just me or has Xander been acting a bit strange?" She asked looking around the table with a worried look. After they closed the Hellmouth…again he's been acting a little strange and un-Xander like.

"He _has _been quiet lately." Buffy agreed, but she didn't find that strange. When the Hellmouth opened he seemed almost desperate to help them and she just figured he was feeling out of the loopy.

"Did you hear what he said to Cordelia after she practically called him worthless?" Willow asked with her brows knitted together in worry.

"He didn't say anything." Oz pointed out with his normal stoic expression. "Then he just smiled at her."

Giles, who had been reading, looked up at them with a puzzled expression, "You're worried that he's being the bigger person? I believe it shows he's growing up."

They all looked at him for a few moments before dismissing his comment entirely. "He no longer volunteers to be distraction guy. And he listens when we tell him to hang back." The more they thought about it, the more they realized that Xander _had_ changed. He still helped with the research, got the snacks, and joked around, but he no longer helped slaying-wise. "He always loved helping." Oz put his hand on Willow's shoulder for comfort.

"Last time he changed, he was a hyena." Buffy reminded and then looked at Giles. "You don't think he's being possessed again, do you?"

Before he could answer Faith walked in dragging an unconscious demon. "I think I got that demon that attacked you, B."

"Where's you find it?" Buffy asked as she walked up to her sister slayer and kicked the demon's leg.

"I didn't. I was just walking around and noticed all the screaming people running away from the Expresso Pump." Faith said with a thoughtful expression.

"Xander went to get us doughnuts! Is he ok?" Willow asked before anyone else could.

"Define ok, 'cause by the time I got to the place Xander was standing over our demon here. Then he told me to bring these to the library and walked away." Faith held up the pink box of doughnuts that they hadn't noticed till that moment.

There was a pregnant pause as everyone tried to digest what the dark haired slayer just told them. "Xander did this?" Giles pointed to the semi dead demon in disbelief.

"Yup. He had this weird look in his eye before he took off like a jet." Faith answered equally baffled.

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	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I couldn't get to sleep and decided to continue this. Again I don't own nothing but my dreams.**

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Xander ran until he couldn't breathe anymore. By the time he slowed down to catch his breath he was at Sunnydale Park. Children were running around having fun and he stood taking deep breathes as he walked towards a bench that was surprisingly empty. He replayed what happened with the demon in his head.

_He had just paid for the gangs doughnuts when a demon ran in destroying everything. It was big, ugly, yellow, and droopy with three horns. People were running away screaming and he just stood there watching. The demon noticed this and decided to charge at him. Then something in Xander snapped, like a switch was flipped and he used the demons momentum to throw him over the counter. He then jumped over the counter and proceeded to punch it in its face._

_Once it finished struggling, he stood up and straightened his clothing before looking down at what he just did. "Xander?" He turned to find Faith looking between him and the demon with a look of shock. "Did you do that?" When he didn't answer she walked closer and touched his arm, "Are you ok?"_

_After one last look at the demon he grabbed the box of sweets and handed them to the slayer. "Take 'em both to the library. Their waiting for them… I gotta go." Then he took off._

He placed his head in his hands as he thought about what he was going to say to the gang. _'Faith is going to tell them.'_ He thought as he sighed. Everything was going too fast and he just wanted it to stop so he could think. _'I never should have done that spell.' _He thought as he sat back on the bench and watched the kids playing around. "They are going to kill me."

"Not if I kill 'em first." The voice startled Xander so much that he jumped off of the bench and turned towards it in a fighting stance. "Wow! I come in peace." The female through her hands up in surrender and Xander visibly relaxed.

"Emilia. Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" He asked as he sat back on the bench with his hand resting on his chest. She sat down next to him and he took in her short black hair, tanned skin, black eyes, dark blue jeans, white t-shirt, and baggy leather jacket. "What are you doing here?"

"Donald wanted to play outside with kids his age." She answered with a smile and leaned towards him. "Are you ok, Hyena?"

"Don't call me that!" He glared at her and now realized how Giles must feel when he calls him G-man. "And no, I'm not ok." He looked around to make sure no one was near them before he leaned closer to whisper, "The spell you did worked."

Emilia gave him a puzzled look. "Didn't you want it to work? I remember you coming to me and practically ordering me to make it work."

After his outing with Jack and his dead buddies, Xander decided he wanted to tap into his inner hyena so he wouldn't have to a liability when it came to fighting. Before Amy became a rat he remembered her talking about a powerful sorcerer that lived down the street from her. All it took was a few questions after knocking on a door to find Emilia. He didn't know what he was expecting, but a 21 year old college student wasn't one of them. After explaining to her what he wanted, Emilia agreed to do it for free.

"I know, but… I didn't expect to be so-so strong or quick on my feet." He said with a voice full of awe at himself.

"What's the real problem here? I mean, you got what you wanted and I've been helping you control your deadlier impulses for two weeks now. Did something bad happen?" Emilia suddenly became serious.

"A demon attacked the Expresso Pump today and I fought it. At first I was nervous and a little scared, but then it was like a light bulb went off in my head and I was in hyena mode. I wasn't nervous any more. _I _fought a demon and won. Me, Xander Harris. It was awesome." His eyes gleamed as he spoke of the events that occurred and it made Emilia smile.

"From the look in your eyes, I'm guessing you loved every second of it."

"Yeah… But then I turned around and there was one of my friends." His happy demeanor was gone and he took on a nervous and frightened look. "I haven't even told them about the spell."

"You're afraid of what your friends are going to do once they find out about the hyena?" She asked with a sympathetic look.

"What if they hate me? I mean I can take them being extremely mad at me because they've been pissed at me before. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if they reject me." He voiced his fears as he stared at the children playing on the swings.

"Your friends consist of two Slayers, a Watcher, a Wicca, a Werewolf, and a Vampire. And you're scared that they would reject you as a Hyena?" Emilia and Xander had gotten to know each other pretty well during the past two weeks and from what she'd heard of his friends she didn't believe they'd do that.

"You don't understand. Last time I was a hyena I was evil and I ate a live pig! I don't know if they'd be able to go through that again if I lose control." He put his head back in his hands and sighed in frustration.

"You have been in complete control for two weeks. All you have to do is meditate for thirty minutes and you're good for a whole day." When he didn't move she threw her right arm around his shoulders and smiled at him, "Hey, it doesn't matter what they say. You did what you thought was right and they don't want to be around you then tough shit. I'm your friend and I'd love to hang out with you when ever."

He peeked at her through his fingers and gave her a small smile. "Thanks, Em. You're a good friend." He hugged her but then pulled away when someone cleared their throat in front of them. "Donald."

The small blond haired boy looked at him with a stoic expression that reminded Xander of Oz and it made him smile at the boy. "Alexander." The boy responded with no emotion behind that one word. His brown eyes tore into Xander's, creeping him out. "Don't touch my sister."

Emilia rolled her eyes at her little brother and tousled his hair as Xander smiled at the younger boy. "I don't hear her complaining." Donne's face got even more expressionless, if that was even possible.

"Your friends won't even recognize you once I'm done cutting you." Xander's smile fell as he watched the little boy walk back to his new friends. Emilia was laughing so much that Xander had a hard time glaring at her.

"I'm sorry, but your face was just priceless. I wish I had a camera." After a few seconds Xander joined in on her laughter.

"I think I needed that." He said once they calmed down.

"Look. Your friends are probably worried about you. You should go talk to them. I can tell that you don't like keeping this a secret from them." She stood up and walked over to her brother.

Xander watched as she grabbed her things and began walking out of the park. He was nervous about what the gang was going to say and it was getting late. He stood and chased after Emilia. "You mind if I crash at your place tonight? The gang will be looking for me and I don't want to be found till I know what to say." She didn't say anything, just inclined her head towards her house and he followed. He'd talk to the Scoobies in the morning.

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	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Still own nothing...**

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The next morning found Buffy, Willow, Oz, and Giles in the library worried out of their minds… well except for Oz, who looked calm as always. They had all gone out patrolling with Buffy the night before and then walked to Xander's house. When his parents refused to let them in, Buffy had climbed into his window to see if he was sleeping, till she realized he wasn't there. They checked every place they could think of and had even asked Angel to keep an eye out for their missing Scooby.

"Where could he be? We checked have checked everywhere!" Buffy didn't like that Xander had just taken off like that and was worried that he had gotten himself into trouble.

"Buffy do calm down. We'll find him, don't worry." Giles, along with Buffy, was pacing the length of the library. Buffy glared at him and he ignored it, "Did you check his house this morning?"

"He's not there. Oz even climbed through the window to make sure." Willow said in a small voice. Her mind was going through all of the different scenarios that could have happened to her best friend.

"What's got you guys all wound up? God, don't tell me there's another apocalypse." Codelia's voice rang out through the library and each occupant glared at her.

"Xander's missing." Oz answered when nobody else did.

Cordelia gave them a confused look, "That would be a bad thing because…?" When she was met with even darker glares she took a step back. "Ok, so it'd be bad if he was missing."

Buffy stopped pacing and looked at Cordelia with hope in her voice, "What do you mean _if_ he was missing?"

"I saw him getting dropped off this morning. He seemed to be real friendly with the woman that was driving. I'm surprised he didn't check in with you losers first." When she seen the confused looks on their faces, she figured she didn't need the book she had gone in for and back pedaled out of the library.

"Xander's ok?" Willow asked.

"Xander was friendly with a woman?" Oz asked and when everyone looked at him he shrugged, "Just trying to stay positive."

"Who has class with Xander next?" Buffy asked. She wanted to know what the hell was going on and she wanted to know now.

"That'd be me." Oz said with a nod of his head as he picked up his math book.

"If you see Xander bring him here. We are going to have a Scooby meeting after we tie him to a chair." Buffy explained.

"That's a bit extreme don't you think? We don't know if he's evil yet." Giles rejected the idea.

"We don't know if he's not." Willow countered and then the bell rang. Everyone looked at each other and Giles shooed them off to class.

Once the bell rang Giles had laid out some rope and duck-tape. Just because he thought it was a bad idea didn't mean he wouldn't tie the boy up. Buffy and Willow were the first one inside the library only seconds after the bell rang, and judging from their heavy breathing Giles could tell they had been running. Oz walked in with Xander a few moments later. The girls ran up to him and hugged him before Giles gave him a manly hug.

"Why's everyone feeling the need to hug Xander?" Xander questioned, even though he knew full well why. "I'm not dying am I?" He asked half joking, half not.

"We were worried about you, Xander. We couldn't find you!" Willow said hugging him again and he hugged her back.

"We thought something bad happened. You know better than to run off." Buffy scolded him with a light punch and he gave them a small smile in return.

"I'm sorry guys. I should have known you guys would have gone searching for me. I wasn't thinking." He apologized and everyone was calm…until Buffy grabbed him by his arm and pulled him to the table. "Ouch! Hey what was that for? If you wanted me to sit down all you had to do was ask."

"Xander, do shut up. You've been acting strange lately and we all want to know why that is." Giles said in a calm voice that scared Xander a bit.

"I-I umm, I've got this…this…thing." He took a deep breath and let it out before clearing his throat. "I've got this thing…inside of me…"

"Oh, no! You're possessed again, aren't you?" Willow asked and Oz put his arm around her to calm her down some.

"No. Yes…Not really…This is coming out all wrong." Xander had spent most of the night practicing what he was going to tell them and now that he was in front of them he couldn't remember one single word.

"What is?" Buffy asked looking down at him. She wanted to understand, but he was just rambling.

Xander looked at a spot on the wall over Buffy's shoulder and next to Giles. "Why can't I just say, 'Hey guys I did this spell that made me one with my inner hyena. But don't worry I've spent weeks perfecting my control over the beast so you didn't have to fear me like the last time…" He closed his eyes and when he opened then he realized he had said the words out loud by the look on every ones face. "Aw Damn."

No one moved they just stared at him. Willow gave him a scared look, while Oz raised his left eye brow. Giles was giving him his disappointed look, while Buffy looked angry. "Look guys I know you hate me right now. But can you tell me if we're still friends? 'Cause I'd really like to know." His voice was barely above a whisper and he became teary-eyed with anticipation.

"I don't know what to say to that…" Buffy said as she took a seat across from him.

"You guys don't trust me." It wasn't a question.

"We do trust you, it's just…Well we remember what happened last time you tried doing a spell." Giles responded. "Or have you forgotten?"

"No." He couldn't look at them any more knowing he put those disappointed and angry looks on their faces. He glanced at Willow, but she was looking at the floor and didn't see the apologetic look he tossed her way.

"Xander you should go." Everyone looked at Willow shocked that _she _of all people would suggest it. "We need time to get use to the idea of you being a Hyena again."

"I'm not…I'm like Oz. It doesn't come out unless it _has _to not when it _wants _to." Xander tried reasoning with his oldest friend.

"It didn't _have _to attack the demon yesterday, but it _did_. You could have hurt somebody. So can you just…please?" Willow went back to looking at the floor.

Xander stared at her for the longest time before standing up and walking to the double doors before looking back at the people he considered family. _'They must hate me.' _He thought as he pushed the door open. "See ya later." With that he was gone.

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	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I own nothing... This one is a little short, but I feel like I needed to add this one in.**

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Later that day during lunch Xander waited till it was half full before walking in, hoping to catch his friends. When he didn't see them he figured they were still in the library and contemplated on whether or not he should go try to reason with them. He knew he shouldn't because they could still be pissed at him and a pissed Slayer is a deadly one. With that decided he walked in line and collected his meal before sitting at an empty table.

Normally he'd get a few things from the vending machine, but he had insisted on paying for gas when Emilia offered to drive him to school. He was about to bite into what looked like string beans…or was it green mash-potatoes? When suddenly a bag of chips landed on his table. He looked at the direction it came from and seen Oz standing there with an amused look on his face. "I think that's the most emotion, I've seen displayed on your face all year."

Oz chuckled and took a seat next to him. "Yeah well. I'd pay money to see people eat what you were about to stick in your mouth." He pointed towards the bag of chips, "For you."

Xander's face split into a wide grin and he gave a relieved sigh. "Whew. I thought I'd have to risk my life for a second." He grabbed the bag and opened it as he looked around the lunch room.

"They're still at HQ." Oz answered his silent question.

"Why are you here then?" He figured they wanted someone to keep an eye on him while he was around people he could hurt.

"You're my friend." Oz slipped a chip into his mouth as Xander thought this over.

"You don't find my being a hyena thing hate worthy?"

"Dude I'm a werewolf." He reminded him with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, but you didn't eat a live pig, or-or attacked Buffy or made Willow cry. I hated every moment of it. You should hate me like they do." Xander placed the bag on the table not feeling hungry any more.

"I've killed people in wolf form… Look, Xander they don't hate you because of the hyena thing. They're mad because you kept it a secret." Xander always liked Oz because the werewolf always seemed to surprise him.

"I hope that's the only thing… Can we change the subject?" Xander picked the bag of chips up again and looked at Oz with a pleading expression.

Oz nodded in agreement and then took a sip of his soda. "Cordelia said she saw you with someone this morning."

Xander looked at him for a second before deciding that Oz would actually benefit from his knowledge. "Yeah, I got a ride from the person that performed the binding spell. She's been helping me control it."

"Who is she?"

"Her name is Emilia Harris. She's a powerful sorcerer that agreed to help me. I was at her place last night. That's why you didn't find me." When all Oz did was raise his brow, Xander blushed a bit. "N-not like that. We're just friends."

"But do you like her?" Oz could hear Xander's heart rate pick up and it made him smirk a bit. "You like her. You tell her yet?"

"I don't want to ruin anything we have going at the moment by adding my attraction into the mix. Plus she's older and has custody of her psychotic younger brother, who by the way hates me." Xander pulled the now empty bag and tossed it in the trash can. "Two points!"

"Well, psychotic little brother's aside, how does she help you with your…hyena thing?"

"We meditate together. There's magic smelling candles involved. Her brother is just like you, ya know. He gets all hairy during the full moon and she helps him meditate. She says he hasn't turned into a wolf during the full moon in two months." Xander could see the hope in Oz's face and decided to toss him a line. "If you want I can ask her if she wouldn't mind helping you."

"You think she'll help? I mean she doesn't know me. Helping her brother keep his beast in check is one thing. I have a stronger beast." Oz was a bit worried, but he no longer wanted to lock himself in a cage during the full moon.

"I'll bribe her if I have to. Anything for my only friend." Xander smiled at him but it didn't reach his eyes and Oz could tell he was hurting.

"They'll come around man. Just give them a little time." They both stood and walked out of the lunch room.

"I hope so." Xander walked to his next class with his head down. The last thing he wanted was to lose his best friends, but if they couldn't get past his hyena thing then he might just have to make new friends.

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	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I just got a new job so it might take some time for me to update this story...**

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"So what are we going to do?" Buffy asked looking back and forth between Willow and Giles. "I mean, it's not really a _bad _thing is it? He said he can control it."

"Being a hyena has been making him un-Xander like. Maybe he's having a hard time controlling it. Who knows when he's going to lose control and attack one of us?" Willow asked and Buffy gave her a confused look.

"You of all people are judging him? Your boyfriend is a _werewolf_!" Buffy couldn't believe that Willow was saying this, maybe Xander wasn't the one with the problem.

"I know Oz won't change at random points during the day. He only changes during the full moon and we lock him in a cage for his own good."

"Maybe we should give Xander the benefit of the doubt, Willow. We did with Oz and he's been nothing but resourceful." Giles finally spoke up.

"Giles is right. And if Xander ever does get out of hand we can just lock him up like we do Oz." Buffy stood up and walked in front of the table. "We should find Xander and tell him…"

"NO!" Willow interrupted making both Giles and Buffy jump in surprise. "We shouldn't have to lock him up at all. He shouldn't have done the spell in the first place. Now we have to keep a closer eye on him in case he loses it."

"Will, what's wrong with you? This is Xander we're talking about. You know silly-caring-lovable-Xander." Buffy argued.

"He's also a hyena."

"And your oldest friend." Giles chimed in. "He's still Xander. Except now he can defend himself more. I don't see the problem here."

"You guys don't understand!" Willow stood up frustrated.

"Then explain it to us because I want to understand, Will, I really do."

"No…" With that Willow left the library leaving behind two very confused people.

"I don't understand why she does not want to help Xander." Giles said as he too stood up and picked up a few books before walking to the stacks.

"Last time Xander went all hyena he made her cry. I thought she had gotten over it, but maybe I was wrong." Buffy collected her things and looked up at her Watcher once he returned to the table. "I'ma head to class. Hopefully I can catch Xander and tell him we're cool with his hyena thing."

"And what of Willow?" Giles asked. "I don't think Xander would take the news of Willow not accepting him to well. We should keep it a secret till she comes 'round."

"Too late." Neither of them had noticed both Xander and Oz walk into the library and heard the whole conversation. "So everyone but Willow is ok with my decision. At less that's a start… I decided to forego class and come here. I guess I should have gone to class."

"Xander…Willow's only….Well I don't know what's up with Willow, but we're not going to judge you." Buffy could see that the only one Xander really wanted to accept him was Willow. "Look, she'll come around. She did with Oz."

"Yeah, man. You know how her brain works. She'll be here in two minutes apologizing for kicking you out in the first place." Oz commented as Xander sat down in a chair.

"With cookies." Giles said and everyone gave him a questioning look, "She made cookies last time she felt guilty…I'm just saying."

"I guess so. Will's always been a bit of a mystery to me. Emilia thought she'd be jealous that I didn't go to her for the spell, but I wanted it to be a surprise." Xander said with a shake of his head. "I hope she's right, thought."

"Who's Emilia?" Buffy asked.

"The girl that did the binding spell. She's been helping me meditate." Xander answered for the second time that day. "You'll be able to meet her today. She's going to pick me up after school. Said something about flexing my hyena muscles."

"So this Emilia person is helping you with everything?" Giles asked as he walked closer to the boy he considered a son. "Are you sure you can trust her?"

"Uber sure. Her little brother is a werewolf and she understands what it means to have something in you that you have no control of. Although I'm pretty sure her brother has uncontrollable serial killer urges." Xander joked and everyone else chuckled and rolled their eyes.

"I'm happy you're still the same old Xander." Buffy said as she bent over to hug him and he happily returned it. "Maybe we can spar some time. I remember you being strong enough to take me."

Xander gave her a real smile this time and nodded his head, "Yeah and think about how much help I can be on patrols now. I can probably take Angel…and win." He could barely contain his mirth and it made everyone around him smile.

"Yes, well, maybe you can do your meditations here from now on. Oz might be able to benefit from them." Giles said as he leaned against the counter.

"Just when I was getting a kick out of being locked in a cage and turning into a murderous beast for three night's outta of the month." Oz sarcastically said with his usual stoicism.

"Yeah. I'd have to check with Emilia first, but other than that I have no objections."

"You seem to have put a lot of faith into this Emilia person." Giles commented with a tile of his head.

"Well yeah. She's been helping me with everything. She's actually the one that convinced me to come clean to you guys. I'm not sure if I would have _ever _been able to tell you if it wasn't for her." Xander's smile became soft once he finished. "Guys, Emilia is a good guy…woman. Please don't think otherwise."

"Giles didn't mean anything by it. We just don't know her. That's all." Buffy explained

"How 'bout I ask her to meet me here? I can introduce her to you guys, ok." Xander offered with a slight smile and the Watcher and Slayer nodded in unison. "Good." He walked behind the counter and dialed the now familiar number.

"I think Xander is a very good judge of character, but do you remember the spell that Amy did for him?" Giles asked as the man in question spoke on the phone.

"I understand Giles. You don't want this chick messing Xander's spell up." Buffy said as she watched Xander. "I hope he's right about her."

Xander walked back into the middle of the floor with a sad smile on his face. "She said she'll be here."

"Then what's with the frowny face?" Buffy asked a bit puzzled.

He glanced at the clock on the wall before heading for the door. "It's been two minutes." With that he sulked off to his next class.

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	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I own nothing...Now that that is out of the way, let me just say I _actually_ enjoyed righting this chapter and I kinda feel bad for the way I portrayed Willow...Oh well.**

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After school Buffy, Giles, and Oz sat around the table waiting for Xander to return. He had left a few moments before to grab a snack, but they knew he was really trying not to think about Willow. She had avoided talking to him the rest of the day and when Buffy and Oz tried to talk to her she made up some excuse and went home. They had all seen the broken hearted look he gave when they told him Willow had left. They all hoped that Willow got over whatever was bothering her because they didn't think Xander could take any more bad news.

The door opened and the three of them looked up to see a woman dressed in blue jeans and a white Henley shirt under a baggy leather jacket. Behind her was a small blonde haired boy who was dressed in khakis, a white long sleeved button down, a red tie, and a tan sweater vest. "I'm looking for Alexander Harris. He told me to meet him here? I'm Emilia Harris." Emilia smiled at the three occupants at the table.

"He'll be back in a just a moment. I'm Rupert Giles. Did you say your last name was Harris?" Giles greeted with a handshake and a smile.

Emilia shook his hand and returned his smile, "Yes. No relations to Al though. This is my brother Donnie. Say hi."

Donnie looked at the small group before him and gave a quick smile, "Hi." He looked at Oz and tilted his head a bit before giving a tiny smile. "You're a werewolf."

Oz raised his brow and smirked at the little boy. "Yeah, I am. I'm Oz."

"Is the stoicism a werewolf thing?" Buffy asked as he looked back and forth between the two wolves. "It's kinda creepy."

"Buffy!" Giles scolded.

"No it's alright. I was just thinking the same thing actually. Donnie go sit down while we wait for Al." Emilia gave the small boy a gentle push and he took the seat across from Oz and just stared at him. "Don't get scared, he does that a lot."

"You called Xander, Al. Why?" Oz asked once he ended the staring contest he was having with the younger wolf.

"Everyone else calls him Xander. And I'm not allowed to call him Hyena anymore." She answered with a shrug and the gang seemed to be ok with that answer. "So you're what Al calls the Scoobies? Isn't there a red head that's supposed to be here?"

"Willow went home." Xander said as he entered the library with a handful of sodas. "I figured you guys be thirsty." He placed the cans on the table and turned to Emilia. "I see you meet everyone…And brought your side-kick."

Donnie glared at the older boy as he snatched a soda and tossed it to his sister. "I wasn't lying about cutting you _Alexander._"

That made Buffy spit out her Pepsi on Xander as she laughed. "Oh my God… I'm so sor-sorry, Xander." She said between giggles.

"It's alright Buff. It's a new way to drink Pepsi." Xander said as he licked the soda from his mouth with a small smile. He then took off his button down and wiped his face with it. "I'm sure deep down…_really _deep down he's a nice little boy. Right, _Donald_?" Xander asked as he threw his now sticky shirt on the table in front of Donnie.

The boy just stared at him with a black expression and then leaned back in his chair. "I'm sure deep down they really love each other." Emilia commented making both of them turn to glare at her. "Agree to disagree."

"Can we get to why you're here Ms. Harris?" Giles interrupted with a small smile.

"Please, call me Emilia. And Xander said something about Oz wanting help with the whole wolf thing?" She looked to the man in question and he nodded. "Alright. Donnie, go get my bag from the car and grab your homework." She handed him her car keys and he left without a word.

"Buffy wants me to train with her. You think I'm ready?" Xander asked as he took the seat that Donnie just vacated.

"Sure, just focus on your breathing. Nothing more than that." Emilia responded with a smile as she moved closer to the group.

"Do you mind if I ask how you're able to help Xander and Donnie with their control?" Giles asked, forever wanting to know more information.

"Sure. I use scented candles, a crystal, some herbs and breathing techniques that I picked up when I studied in Tibet."

"What kind of crystal and herbs?"

"Peppermint herbs. It helps with clearing the mind and helping the mind focus. I use the Blue Quartz crystal. It helps relieve stress and has a calming effect. It is also well-known for its ability to enhance mental functions."

"Interesting." Giles said and as he walked to the stacks and grabbed a few books off of a shelf.

"Don't worry he does that a lot." Buffy assured when she noticed Emilia's confused expression.

Donnie walked back in no longer wearing his sweater vest or tie. A red bag hung over his shoulder and a few books where under his right arm. "Here you go. The keys are in the bag." He handed the bag to his sister and then took a seat at the head of the table to do his homework.

"Al, you mind helping?" Emilia asked as she unzipped the bag and began pulling out different colored candles.

"Sure, Em." Xander grabbed a few candles then started placing them in a circle on the floor. "Oz, we are gonna be in the middle of them so don't knock any of 'em down."

"I'll be sure to remember that." Oz responded.

"What kind of candles are you using?" Buffy asked before Giles had the chance.

"Regular ones. I've got one that smells like a vanilla cake, two lavender, two cherry, two lilac, and sandalwood and one that smells like baby powder."

"Baby powder?" Buffy questioned face full of disbelief.

"Yeah. Donnie likes the smell, so I always throw it into the mix." Emilia said as Xander started lighting the wicks and she took out the peppermint. "Alright, now all you guys have to do is meditate until you focus on your inner beast." She handed each boy a peppermint and they ate it.

"What about the crystals?" Giles asked as he looked up from the book he was reading on that particular crystal.

"Right! Almost forgot." She reached inside the back and pulled out a necklace with a pendant hanging from it. "All you need to do is concentrate on the crystal hanging from the necklace and it'll help you focus." Emilia handed it to Oz, who looked at it with curiosity. "It's not gonna bit. Xander and Donnie both have one."

Xander lifted his out from under his shirt and smiled at his friends as he showed it off. "You barley know you have it after a while." He sat in the middle of the lite candles and closed his eyes. "Join me, won't you?" He asked the skeptic Oz.

"Will I be able to benefit from this too, Giles?" Buffy asked as she looked back at her Watcher.

"I'm not sure, really. I mean we practically practice on your concentration each week and you've gotten better at it."

"Yeah, but I never got to do it with my friends…" Buffy gave him her best pout.

He sighed before rolling his eyes, "Very well then."

She jumped up in victory and sat next to Xander, who sat across from Oz. Donnie had stopped trying to do his homework and quietly walked towards the small gathering before sitting down next to Oz. They all sat cross legged and with their backs straight they closed their eyes. Emilia placed her finger on her lips so Giles knew not to disturb their meditation with talking.

Xander focused on the small crystal hanging from his neck and took deep breaths. As he cleared his mind he could feel the hyena trying to break free. It wanted to take over and roam free, but he kept it at bay. The hunger it had was making him dizzy, but he just ignored it and focused on his breathing.

Oz felt like he was in a dream state without dreaming. As he took a deep breath he breathed in lavender and lilac. _'Not a bad combination.' _He thought as he took another deep breath. This time he felt a clawing feeling deep within himself and his heart rate started to pick up speed. The wolf wanted to take over and it wanted to kill something. He felt what it wanted to do and his mouth began to water as he felt himself merging with his inner beast. It startled him so much that as he opened his eyes he jerked back and knocked a candle over.

Emilia and Giles both looked up at the scared young man with worry etched on their faces. Oz then looked at the others within the circle and he noticed that everyone was now looking at him. "Um, I-I'm sorry. I messed up your meditations…"

"I was scared my first time to." Donnie said in a soft voice and an understanding smile.

"Yeah. It's not a cool thing touching that inner part of yourself, but you get used to it." Xander added.

"How do you deal with the blood lust?" Oz asked as he picked up the fallen candle. The wax stuck to the floor and he threw Giles and apologetic smile.

"Only give into it when you have to. Like when I fought that demon yesterday. I just focused and then got a hold of that hungry hyena." Xander answered with a smile. He knew what Oz was feeling was way more dangerous and blood lusty then his own inner demon, but he hopped the older boy didn't abandon everything out of fear. "You wanna try again?"

Oz took a deep breath and reached up to touch the crystal hanging from his neck. "May-maybe some other time? I think a few minutes was enough time to _touch _my inner wolf." His voice was a little shaky, but the others understood.

"I can come back if you'd like. Or if not then I'm sure Xander wouldn't mind hooking everything up and meditating with you. I don't recommend you doing this by yourself just yet." Emilia said with a small smile playing at her lips.

"Why not?" Buffy asked as Xander helped her stand.

"The first few times can be extremely difficult and there could be a chance that he might accidently let the wolf out." Emilia explained as she to stood up. "Donnie had an accident after the first couple of tried. It took us forever to finally catch him."

"Us?" Giles asked as he stared at the hardened wax on the floor.

"Me and my parents. My father's the one that took me to Tibet in the first place. He was an adventurer and he sometimes took us with him on his trips. My father had a friend that was a monk and he allowed us to stay at his temple."

"The monks taught you everything, so you decided to help others?" Buffy asked.

"Not entirely. The monks taught me about crystals and how to control my inner magic. I kept it to myself mostly. Then after my parents died, as an experiment I taught Donnie. It seemed to work, so I bragged my findings to Amy, who referred me to Xander." Emilia explained smiling at the dark haired boy.

"Extraordinary. You wouldn't mind if I picked your brain for a bit would you? I find that you having been taught my monks fascinating." Giles asked with a smile that Oz usually got when he was around Willow and Xander could feel himself getting jealous.

"No, I don't mind. I could come by tomorrow if that's alright with you guys?" She asked the younger people around her and they all agreed.

"It's getting late. You should head home. It gets dangerous at night." Buffy informed the older girl.

"You're right. Donnie get your things, we'll come back after you get out from school." She watched as her younger brother bowed his head slightly before collected his things. "Well, I guess you can pick my brain then." She smiled back at Giles before looking at Xander, "Hyena-Boy don't worry about your other friend. She'll come around. I mean come on, who in their right mind would cut off all communication with you?"

"You're right." With a final smile the small group watched them take their leave. Xander had thrown a dirty look at Giles, who had gone back to familiarizing himself with crystals, and then he casted a sad glance back at the double doors before thinking _'Everything is about to get interesting…'_

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**Once again I believe the review button is calling your name...Don't you hear it? Click it! :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I am Sooooooooo SORRY I've had some personal problems going on and then my computer decided it no longer wanted to live. So I had to get a new one. I hope you guys don't hate me to much for keeping you waiting for so long.**

**Once again I own nothing. Wish I did though...**

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Willow sat in her room with a book in her lap. She had gotten home to find her parents nowhere to be found so she had decided to order pizza for dinner. Once it came she retired to her room. She had been trying to read the same page for the past two hours now. Every time she seemed to be focusing, her mind wondered back to Xander and his spell. _'Why would he do such a thing?'_ She thought as she finally gave up on her homework and tossed the book on the edge of the bed. _'Why didn't he come to me? I could have helped him….' _She thought as she stood up to begin pacing."I'm his friend…" She muttered to herself.

There was a knock at her door that made her jump. She turned to see Xander standing outside with a hopeful smile. "You mind letting an old friend in? Please…" He pleaded, his brown eyes opening wider as he pouted. She rolled her eyes and sighed as she walked over and opened the door. "Thanks, Will." He said with a smile as he walked in.

"What do you want?" She asked, it came out harsher then she had meant, but she was still a little mad at him.

He felt nervous all of a sudden and then flashed her a small smile. "Golly gee, Will. Are you ever not gonna be mad at me?" He asked with a sad look her way.

"Xander….I-I….Why didn't you come to me? I would have helped you." She said as she sat on her bed with a sigh.

"Because I knew if I went to you then you'd find a way to talk me out of it. I didn't want that. Going to a stranger was my best option. The rest of the gang thinks it was a good idea. Hell even Oz wants to know how to control his inner wolf."

"Oz?" She asked with concerned eyes.

"Don't freak, Willow. He doesn't want to turn into a hairy beast every full moon. Can you really hold that against him? Or the fact that I no longer wanted to be a liability while fighting vamps."

"Xander, I can see where you're coming from, but I'm not so sure about it. I mean, last time you went all Hyena you kinda…ate a live pig and would have eaten Flutie, if Buffy didn't knock you out."

Xander smiled at her and nodded his head. He could tell that she was coming around. It didn't matter to him how long it took for her to be truly ok with it, but it was a start. "How about this? I'm going to leave. If you wake up in the morning and don't ever wanna talk to me again….then I'll learn to deal with it. But…If you wake up and think it's totally cool to have a Hyena as a best friend then we'll go from there. Sound good?" He asked his voice once again full of hope.

Willow finally managed to smile at him after a few minutes. He hadn't seen her smile in what seemed like forever and it made his own smile widen. "I guess I can live with that." She said as they both stood up. "You going straight home?" She asked as she walked him to the sliding door.

"Yes. Giles wants me to patrol with Buffy tomorrow night, right after training." She nodded her head in response to that. "Emilia Harris… The witch that did the spell is going to be there. Everybody wants to see if I could keep up with the Slayer." He looked at her with a small smile, "Even if you decide you hate me, I still want you to meet her. She kinda reminds me of you and how you are with your spells. I want you two to be friends, it'll make my life easier."

Willow gave him a friendly look and nodded her head. It was the least she could do for abandoning him. "Sure. I'll be there." With that Xander left and Willow went back to trying to do her homework.

'_Maybe this _could _be a good idea…I mean he seems happy..." _She thought as she laid back on her bed with her math book on her lap.

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The next day found Xander and Buffy walking into school together. "So, Emilia seems like a nice person." Buffy commented as they entered the school. "Her brother on the other hand is kinda creepy."

Xander laughed as they stopped by the vending machine, "Yeah. Donnie has that effect on people. I swear he's gonna actually try and kill me one day." He joked as he put in a few quarters. "Coke?"

"Yes please. I don't think he's gonna kill you. I think he doesn't want you getting together with his sister." Buffy said as he handed her, her coke.

Xander instantly blushed and looked down at his feet. "Am I that obvious?"

Buffy smiled and took pity on the young Hyena. "If looks could kill then the one you gave Giles yesterday would have put him in a grave. Why don't you tell Emilia you like her?"

"Cause she's older. What if she doesn't like me because I'm younger than her?"

"There's always Cordelia…I can't believe I just said that."

Xander sighed and put his arm over Buffy's shoulders as they walked to the library. He couldn't ever see himself with Cordelia again and he didn't want to get back with her. The only problem with getting with Emilia was that she was older and he didn't want her thinking he was just a child.

"Hey guys."

They both stopped just inside the library when they heard Willow's voice. They just stared for a few moments till Xander gave a shit eating grin and ran up to her and threw his arms around her. "WILLOW!"

She returned the hug in kind and smiled when he didn't let go, "I woke up this morning and couldn't really see myself cutting you out of my life. I mean, come on your my best friend in the whole world." Buffy cleared her throat and she corrected herself. "My best _male _friend in the whole world."

"She also brought cookies." Giles said from behind the counter around a mouthful of Willow's guilt cookies. "Like I said she would." The young adults just looked at him with comical expressions. "Well forgive me for thinking positively." He said as he walked into his office.

"Anyway, I'm glad you're back Will. We've missed you." Buffy said as she hugged the red head.

"I missed you guys to." She turned to look at Xander and gave him a guilty smile, "I'm sorry I was being such a poopy head."

"It's alright Willow. All that needs to be done is to eat your cookies and all will be right in my world." He smiled at her as he grabbed three cookies and stuck a forth on in his mouth. "Mmm. I love your cookies. I could just bath in them…" When he looked back at the girls they were giving him strange and wigged-out expressions. "What?"

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that and proceed to ask Buffy how patrol went last night. Please answer in detail." Giles said as he walked out of his office and took a seat farthest from Xander.

"I dusted six vamps last night. Nothing special. Patrol would have gone quicker if I had help, but I couldn't find Faith." Buffy said as she took a seat next to Xander.

"I'd like for Xander to patrol with you tonight after training. Is that alright?"

Xander, who's mouth was full of cookies, nearly choked as he tried to express his joy at the fact they wanted him to help. Buffy quickly patted him on the back as he chugged his soda. "I'm alright…I'm good. Thanks…ARE YOU SERIOUS? I would love nothing more, then to patrol with Buffy!"

"Are you sure you're ready for that?" Willow asked from her place by the counter top. "I don't mean to say I don't think you're ready, I just want to make sure you _are _ready."

"I'll call Emilia right now and have her meet us here at an earlier time." Xander said as he stood up, but was stopped by Giles.

"I've already called and arranged everything. She will be here during your last class."

Xander threw Giles a disgusted look before schooling his features and giving a small smile. "How am I supposed to learn _anything_ if I'm in class when she gets here?"

Giles suppressed the urge to roll his eyes at the younger man, before he answered him. "Oz has a free block then, she wants him to meditate today. Is there a problem?" He asked when he noticed that Xander was giving an annoyed look.

Xander quickly glanced at Buffy, who gave him a small shrug in reply. "No…No, I just, just thought that umm, well…You know, we'd be doing the whole meditating thing together. In case Oz freaks again."

"Oz freaked out?" Willow asked in a worried voice. "Where is he? Have you seen him?"

"He's fine. He is just having a hard time adjusting to the fact that he will be able to control the whole wolf thing." Xander answered quickly. "He should be here any minute."

Not ten seconds after Xander had spoken the words did the doors open and Oz walked in. His quick eyes scanned the room and his face broke into a smile once he seen Willow. "I knew you'd come 'round." He gave her a peck on the cheek and she smiled back at him.

"The hormones have a somewhat sweet smell." Xander said and then quickly blushed and put his head down. "That came out wrong and freaked _me _out."

"I'd like to study you." Everyone then turned to look at Giles and he quickly explained, "For further research of course."

"This is just one awkward morning." Buffy muttered as she looked down at the books on the table. "What is all this?"

"I was researching the mediations that Emilia mentioned. The ones the monks taught her. It's actually an interesting read-"

"Giles, what did you find out." Buffy interrupted.

"Right. Um, nothing I didn't already know. Although I read, that there were some Monks that had gone to Tibet and isolated themselves during the full moon. They meditated to keep a beast caged within themselves." He explained as he wiped his glasses.

"So, what you're saying is that even monks turn into werewolves during the full moon?" Willow asked as she took a seat next to Oz.

"Exactly. Though the Monks obviously had more practice with this method, they advise young werewolves to learn this, so they can control the wolf in them."

"Interesting." Willow said.

"Boring!" Xander said as he finished off his can of soda.

"Xander this is important. Not only for you, but for Oz as well." Giles walked back to the table and looked down at the boy. "You should study this."

"Come on G-Man. That's what I got you for. You do the work and I'll copy… Although I'll reword it of course, you know how teachers can be when you don't turn in your own work." He smiled at the older man, who just rolled his eyes.

"Don't call me that…" Giles muttered before he walked into his office for some tea.

"Giles is only trying to help, Xan." Buffy reasoned and Xander had the decency to look a little guilty.

"I know…It's just that, well… Emilia has been saying the same thing for weeks and I have been doing the reading…" Buffy, Willow, and Oz gave him a look, "Ok, I did some of the reading." Again with the looks. "Ok, I bought the books and they've been collecting dust. But I don't see why I _have _to learn this stuff. I'm stronger, faster, more flexible, and can control the beast in me. Do I really need to learn more? I mean come on, did you or Faith read that _Vampyr _book?"

Buffy rolled her eyes, but she couldn't help but smile at her best friend...After all he did have a point. "Ok, I get what you're saying. Can you at least inform Giles that you will, at some point, do the reading?"

"I'll do him one better, right Will?"

Willow looked at her two best friends and gave a bright smile. "Just bring me the books and I'll read them. Then I'll give you the cliff notes."

"That's my Willow. Always looking out for me." Xander said with a smile.

"Now that you can look out for yourself, why don't you _actually _do the reading instead of having Willow do it." Oz asked, his face as natural as ever.

"But I don't wanna read…" Xander pouted as he sunk into his chair and the gang just smiled at his silliness.

Giles reappeared with a cup of tea in one hand and a book in the other. "The bell is about to ring. I'm sure you lot have class. On that note, please leave."

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're kicking us out cause you got a hot date." Buffy commented with a sly smirk.

"You're right." Giles answered as he sipped his tea.

"That you have a date?"

"No that you don't know any better. Snyder is going to have a few guest look at some of the class rooms today and they will be visiting the library." He explained as he continued to read.

"Wouldn't they be happy to know that students actually use this place? For you know, reading and stuff." Xander said as he gathered up his things.

"I think Snyder would be more surprised that students _could _read. Although seeing is believe. I've only ever seen Willow read a book." Giles said with a small smile playing at his lips.

"Hey! We read. We help with the research." Buffy defended with a hand on her hip.

"Doesn't count. You _have _to research. I was referring to the fact that _Willow _is the only one out of the lot of you that reads for _fun._"

"What is this fun reading you speak of?" Xander joked. Just before Giles could reply the bell rang and the gang filed out with a quick goodbye. "Giles I'll see you later for training." Xander reminded him and all Giles could do was give a quick nod of his head before the young man was gone.

* * *

Third period found Giles sitting in the library reading a book (big surprise, right?) when the doors burst open and startled him. He spilled his tea on his pants looked up to glare at the small man standing in the door way. Snyder stood there with a look that dared Giles to say something. "Principle Snyder. How may I help you?" Giles asked through clenched teeth as he brushed at his pants.

"I have some guest that are here to browse through the selection of books that we have. I didn't mean to startle you, Mr. Giles." Snyder said with a half-assed apology.

"You didn't startle me. I simply missed my mouth." Came Giles sarcastic remark followed by an eye roll that Snyder didn't catch. "Where are the guest?"

"History class. I'll bring them by in a few minutes. Tidy up the place it looks like children where in here."

"God forbid." Giles muttered as he walked into his office to grab some napkins to clean up the spilled tea. When Giles had returned he noticed that Snyder was gone and he cursed out loud as he cleaned the table.

"Who pissed you off?"

Giles jumped once again and turned towards the voice from the Stacks. "Must you do that _every _time you enter?" He glared at the soulful vampire.

"Didn't mean to startle you." Angel said looking guilty.

"I wasn't startled! _Why _must everyone think they scared me today?" Giles fumed and Angel took a step back not knowing if the Watcher was in a stabbing kind of mood or not.

"I'll come back…"

Giles stopped him from moving by calling his name. "Forgive me. I've been having a bad couple of minutes."

"I can see that."

"Is there something you needed?"

"I heard that the demon that attacked Buffy the other night was killed."

"That's correct."

"Willy said some kid killed it? Is that true?"

"Yes. Xander actually."

"Xander?" Angel was even more confused than he was ten seconds ago.

"I don't have time to explain though. Snyder is going to be here any moment with a group of people that are inspecting the school. If you could come by later, while Buffy is training I can explain more."

Angel nodded his head, "I'll see you then." With that he was gone.

"Mr. Giles, what are you looking at?" Snyder said only a few seconds later.

Giles turned to see Snyder, along with three other men, two women, and to his surprise Emilia. "I was… looking at the window. A bird flew into it."

"Poor bird." Emilia replied.

"Yes, poor bird." One of the men said. "I take it that you are the librarian?"

"Yes, where are my manners. I am Rupert Giles, the librarian." Giles said with an extended hand.

"I'm Tom Green and these are my associates Mister Jonathan Arnold, Professor Zackary Conner, Misses Amanda Ball, Doctor Rebecca Beck, and Miss Emilia Harris." Mr. Green said as each shook Giles hand.

"Nice to meet you all." Giles gave Emilia a pointed look and she just smiled at him. "Please feel free to look around and ask me anything you want." With that said the group spread out and each found a place to browse through.

"Where do you keep all your Slayer related books?" Emilia asked in a soft voice.

"Mostly in the Stacks. But other than that every -where." He said as he quickly scanned the others in the room. Snyder was standing in the middle of the room looking like he was important. He just looked stupid to Giles. "Why are you with them?"

"I'm studying under Professor Conner. He thought it'd be a nice change of pace to take me one of the school visits. I thought it'd be fun." She answered as she looked around the library.

"What are you studying?" Giles asked.

"Psychology. He's a part of the Sunnydale School committee. He's in charge of examining the school counselors and things like that."

"Ah. I see. But aren't others studying under him as well?"

"Yes, but I'm also his assistant. So I get double points."

Giles chuckled at that and looked towards the doors as they opened to reveal Xander and Oz walking in with their history book in hand. "I'm ready to train!" Xander announced before coming to a halt a few feet behind Snyder, who turned around to glare at the young man.

"Train? Train for what?" Mr. Green asked as he replaced the book on its shelf and looked at Xander.

"Didn't know you had a full house G-Man. A little heads up would have been helpful." Xander said as he glanced around the room and noticed all the people. "Emilia!"

"Maybe if you didn't mouth off then it'd be less awkward." Oz commented with a slight nod in Emilia's direction.

"You haven't answered my question young man. What is Mr. Giles training you for?" Mr. Green repeated as he also eyed Emilia.

"For English." Giles quickly lied. "I'm helping him in English, though he continues to complain that learning is like taking a lap around the school." That wasn't a lie, Xander had told him that once when the gang had decided to study in the library.

"Ahh. You think it foolish to learn something new?" Dr. Beck asked, almost outraged.

"Not at all Ma'am, it just gets my wheels turning is all." Xander replied with an innocent smile.

"How is it you know my assistant? Emilia." Professor Conner asked his accent was Irish.

"He babysits Donnie after school." Emilia said and the Professor didn't seem to buy it, but none the less backed off from the subject.

"Don't you kids have class?" Snyder asked, he was irritated and he wanted the students to know.

"We have a free block." Oz answered as the girls walked in.

"Of course Ms. Summers." Snyder muttered to himself, although Buffy, Xander, and Oz heard him.

"What's going on?" Buffy asked she stood next to Xander, with Willow next to Oz.

"Giles has company." Xander stated the obvious.

"I can see that. Are we allowed to…study in here? Or do we have to come back later?" Buffy asked with a small glare aimed at Snyder.

"Come back later." Snyder ordered and the four teenagers began filing out, before Professor Conner called out to them.

"We should be the ones leaving. Not you four. Mr. Giles it was a pleasure, we thank you for your time." He shook Giles hand and walked out the double doors with the others quickly doing the same. Snyder, who looked a bit deflated, hurried after them.

"Emilia this is Willow. Willow, Emilia." Xander introduced and the two girls looked at each other before smiling and shaking hands. Xander let out a big breath and smiled at the two of them. "Please tell me you guys are going to be friends."

"Al, we just met. I have to go, but I'll catch you guys after school." With that Emilia was gone and left Xander staring after her.

"Xander and Emilia sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G." Willow sang and Xander glared at her as he blushed making the rest of the gang laugh at him.

"Y-you like E-Emilia?" Giles stuttered with a smirk as he studied Xander.

"Yeah, so what?" He was growling and the others slowly stopped laughing.

"It was just a question, Xan. No need to bit Giles's head off." Buffy commented then thought about her words for a second. "Bad choice of words."

Xander took a few deep breaths as he removed his necklace from behind his shirt so he could rub it. It took him a full minute to calm himself and when he did his eyes opened. His normally brown eyes where yellow for a few moments before turning back to its normal color. "Sorry. I guess the Hyena doesn't like me being teased. I gotta work on that." His voice was calm so everyone released the nervous breath they were holding.

"I guess so." Giles replied before changing the subject. "Buffy, Angel stopped by a few moments ago."

"Crap! I forgot I was supposed to meet with him last night, but I was so tired that I just bailed on him. Did he look upset?"

"No, just confused."

"Confused?"

"He didn't know about Xander."

"Oh. Yeah, that's why I was gonna meet with him. To tell him about what Xander did."

"That will very well have to wait till after school. I don't want to risk anything with the visitors walking about school. We have to reschedule training till after school today. Instead of doing it now." Giles explained and the gang seemed to agree.

"Cool with me. Ima catch some Z's on the couch." Xander said as he walked into Giles office.

"Catch some what?"

"He's going to nap." Buffy said in a slow voice that made Giles roll his eyes.

Xander laid on the couch with one foot planted on the floor. As he stared at the ceiling he replayed all the emotions that went throw him as his friends teased him and then the pure rage that followed after. He wanted to kill them. All of them, because they laughed at him. He took another deep breath, glade that he was able to control it. Although he was sure that Oz could smell the pure rage that poured off of him in waves. All he had to do was learn to control that rage and he'd be fine… Right?

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**Please review :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Don't own anything...**

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_He walked down the hall cautiously. He was dressed in a pair of black boots and black pants, a black button up shirt over a white t-shirt with a leather jacket to top it off. It was dead quiet as he neared the door at the end of the hall. Once he reached it he slowly turned the knob and walked out into the cold cemetery. He pulled the collar of his jacket up to shield his face from the harsh winds that were rippling through the grave yard. He could see the air with every breath he took._

_He heard whispers coming from farther down. He looked behind him and the door was gone. _'No going back now.' _He thought as he followed the voices that were rippling through the air. Tombstone after tombstone he followed the whispers. Then he suddenly stopped once he heard an obnoxious laugh behind him. He turned and saw no one, so he continued towards the hushed voices. There was a clearing not far ahead. In the middle of the clearing he could see the gang, Angel, Faith, and Cordelia included. They were standing in the field waiting for him. _

_The girls all had on the same strapless, silk, figure fitting dresses and high heels that matched their dress. The guys had the same button up shirts and ties, with black dress pants and dress shoes._

_Willow was wearing yellow. Buffy was wearing white. Cordelia was in her natural pink. Faith was wearing black. Oz was wearing a blue shirt with a yellow bow-tie to match Willow. Angel was wearing a grey shirt with a white thin tie to match Buffy. Giles was wearing a green shirt, his tie had white, yellow, and red strips doing diagonally._

_He looked down at himself and noticed that his clothes had changed. Gone was the punk look. It was replaced with a red button up shirt, black slacks, and dress shoes. His tie was hanging from his neck undone. He quickly tied it and noticed the color to be black with red stripes. He looked towards the gang and they all smiled at him urging him forwards._

_But before he could make it any farther that laugh he heard before returned and he looked behind him. Emilia and Donnie stood behind him with similar clothing to the gang. Emilia was dressed in red, while Donnie had a purple button up with a purple and green poke-a-dotted bow-tie. They smiled at him, but didn't pull him towards them like the other had did. He was confused at this but moved towards the gang._

_Once he reached his friends they all embraced him and patted his shoulder. With a smile he looked back towards Emilia and her brother, but what he seen erased the smile from his face. The siblings were watching the friends mingle as black smoke crept behind them. Then the smoke turned into a human figure and laid one of its smoky hands on Donnie's shoulder. The young boy jerk backwards as a wolf jumped out from his body. The wolf then attacked Emilia and he watched in horror as his mentor and friend was eaten._

_None of his friends seemed to notice the violence on the outer side of the field. The smoky figure then fixed it's gaze on an oblivious Oz. Xander watched as the figure crept closer towards his were friend. Donnie's wolf sat in the grass just staring at the small group with bored eyes. Xander tried to push Oz out of the way but Donnie's wolf intervened and tackled him to the ground before he got to the werewolf. The black figure was now laying his hand on Oz's shoulder. He watched as his friend turned into a wolf and attacked the closes person, Willow. Xander kicked and screamed, but The Wolf wouldn't get off of him._

_But then Willow was saved by Angel, who snapped Oz's neck. Xander was conflicted, should he be happy that Willow was alive, sad that Oz was dead, or angry that Angel killed the were wolf. All he did was scream. He was finally able to push the Wolf off of him and he stood up. As he did ne noticed that the scene once again changed. Not only was Emilia, Donnie, and Oz dead, but so was everyone else. Giles, Willow, Buffy, Cordelia, and Faith. Angel stood off to the side holding Buffy's body in his arms as he cried over the loss of her. The black figure was drinking the blood of the now dead wolf that held him down only seconds before._

_His eyes turned yellow as he let the rage in him take over. His nails grew a bit as he gave into the Hyena. His canines grew sharper as he stepped closer to the black figure that had no doubt killed everyone he cared for. He ran and tackled the figure and they wrestled for a few moments till Xander gripped it's throat and slowly began squeezing the life out of it. With each second that past the figure began once again taking human form. _"Who are you!? Why did you do this?" _He asked it as it's face was taking shape._

"I am what you are to become. I did not do this. You did." _It's voice was husky and confident._

_Xander watched as the once black smoke took shape and he shuddered at what it had turned into. Him. He let go of the monster that had murdered his family and moved away from it. It… He… walked towards a weeping Angel and plunged a stake through his heart and Xander watched the last of his friends turn to dust. The other him walked up to him with a smirk and as it disappeared he grabbed Xander's chest. _"Time to let the beast out." _Xander screamed as the Hyena took over completely and jumped out of his body and into the field. The Hyena then turned and attacked him….._

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Xander woke up screaming.

"Calm down! You were having a nightmare." Came a voice next to him. Then he felt a cold towel on his head. When he finally cleared his eyes he took in his surroundings. Willow seating at the edge of the couch with Oz standing next to her. Buffy was seating in front of him with a damp towel in her hand. Giles was standing at the head of the couch with a book in his hands. Angel stood leaning against the door jam with a concerned look on his face that was being projected from everyone in the room. "Are you ok?"

Xander stared at Buffy for a second before taking a deep breath realizing that it was just a bad dream…An _extremely _bad dream. "I-I'm f-fine. What happened?"

"We were all sitting around the table when you started screaming." Willow said still with a worried look.

"Yeah, man. We all burst in here with weapons." Oz added.

"We tried to wake you up when we realized you were sleeping." Angel also added in his impute.

"Hold on, when did you get here? I thought you weren't going to show up till school was over?" Xander asked, a bit confused as to why the vampire was there.

"Xander, school has been over for an hour. You've slept through the last few hours of it." Giles answered as he reached toward his desk and offered Xander a sandwich.

He grabbed it and looked around with a disbelieving look. "Why didn't any of you wake me up?"

"Well, you looked so peaceful that we didn't really have the heart to wake you. So we left you sleeping." Willow answered with a guilty look. "Actually, when we did try to wake you up you wouldn't wake. So we left you."

Xander chuckled a bit as he took a bit of the offered food. "Why is everyone here again?" He asked, his still disoriented mind hadn't caught up with everything yet.

"You screamed, like you were getting axed." Oz offered.

"Giles had to perform a spell to wake you up. That must have been some nightmare you were having." Buffy said as she gave him the towel to clean his face as he finished off the sandwich.

"I was that out of it?" He asked. When they all nodded he quickly replayed the dream in his head and then tried to put it out of his mind. "Ok… I'm hungry."

"Xander we should try and figure out what's wrong with you, not act like this didn't happen." Giles said as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"I'm not acting like it didn't happen. I was having a horrible dream that my brain didn't want me to wake up from. Simple psychology. Nothing more. Now can I please get some food?" Xander stood and stumbled a little. His leg was asleep. "Damn it!" He hissed as he rubbed his leg till he felt the pins and needles effect.

The others just looked at him and filed out of the office. If he wasn't going to address the problem, they were not going to force him to. It took another full minute till he walked into the main room and he was heading for the door when it opened to reveal Emilia and Donnie. "Where's the fire, Darling?" Emilia asked with a smile.

"I'm hungry." Xander said as he walked past her and the younger werewolf. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

Everyone watched as he stormed off. "He was kinda bitchy wasn't he?" Donnie asked as he ignored the conflicted young man that had left.

* * *

Xander had made it to the Expresso Pump before he finally stopped moving and took a seat at one of the tables. Images of his friend's lifeless eyes looking up at him kept appearing in his mind's eye and he couldn't shake it. He suddenly started laughing and everyone around him gave him odd looks as he held his stomach because he was laughing so hard.

"Care to let me in on the joke?" A familiar voice spoke in front of him and when he opened his eyes he noticed that Faith had a smirk on her face. "You ok X?"

"I'm fine. Not that you care." He could smell the faint scent of sex on her and gave her a wolfish smile. "Although if you want, you can care about me in other ways." He then winked at her.

Faith was a little confused at first because Xander had never been that up front about anything. "Hate to burst your bubble, but just 'cause we slept together once, doesn't make us an item."

"Who said I wanted us to be an item?" He smiled again showing off his teeth. "A little roll in the sack every now and then doesn't seem like a big deal."

"What would your precious Scooby Gang think?" She asked with a smile of her own.

"Who cares what they think. Nobody tells me what…or who to do." As soon as the words left his mouth Faith latched on to his lips and kissed him long and hard. "Is that a yes?"

"I got some things to take care of. Come by my place later tonight. I'll show you a good time." With that Faith turned and walked away missing as Xander's eyes flashed yellow.

Xander watched her walk away and ordered two boxes of doughnuts as he flirted with the blonde girl at the counter. Once he had the boxes and the girl's number he walked back to Sunnydale High. On his way to the door leading to the back of the library he noticed a man sitting on a bench reading a book and he smiled as he made a detour and took a seat next to him. The man looked to be in his mid-20 and Xander licked his lips as he took in the scent of the fresh faced man.

"Are you waiting for the bus too?" Asked the man as he placed his book on his lap and rubbed his eyes.

"No. I'm just hungry."

"Must be why you have the doughnuts, huh?" The man laughed at his own joke and waited for Xander to respond.

He smiled at him, and his eyes flashed yellow again. "Something like that." He then pounced on the man and tore at his neck. He bite into the young man's throat as he screamed for help that wasn't coming. Within moments he had moved the body into the bushes and began nipping at the human flesh.

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	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: This chapter is short. I know I'm a horible person for making you guys wait... I was having trouble trying to figure how how I want things to turn out. I do promise the next chapter will be up in about a week.**

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Xander walked into the library with a big smile on his face. Everyone looked at him with concern and didn't say anything, waiting for him to start the conversation. Xander looked around and took a deep breath. "I'm fine guys, no need to worry." He then turned to Giles and gave him an apologetic smile, "I'm sorry about earlier. I was being an ass."

"Apology accepted." Giles replied as he placed a hand on Xander's shoulder. "You're nightmare must have really frightened you." He said with a bit of caution.

Xander nodded his head slowly as the images came back to him. "Y-y-you all died. In my dream." The words came out in almost a whisper, but everyone heard it. He looked around the library and watched their expressions go from surprised and shocked to sympathetic and reassuring.

"B-but it was only a dream. Dreams aren't always nice and they never tell you the truth…And as you can see we are still alive." Willow said as she walked up to him and placed a hand on his arm.

"Buffy has dreams that tell her the truth." Xander countered with his head down.

"I'm a Slayer. You're not, so your dream can't possibly come true." Buffy added with a small smile that went unnoticed by the scared young man.

"Actually people that possess magical abilities _are _known to have prophetic dreams. And since Xander had that binding spell done, he is now in the position to have such dreams." Angel said with a smirk that quickly went away when everyone glared at him. "I shouldn't have told ya that…Sorry."

"Come on Al, if our nightmares came true then this world will be filled with a _lot _of scary shit." Emilia replied from her place at the table. "Tell us what happened. It can't be as bad as you're making it seem."

Xander looked at Emilia and took a deep breath. "I killed all of you." The room went extra silent and Emilia gave a silent 'Oh' before urging him to continue. "I lost control of the beast and it killed every single one of you. Faith and Cordelia included. At first it was this dark smoky figure that killed you all. But then it was me. I figured out that if I lost control, I'd hurt you guys. And that is something that I do not want to happen. Ever."

"It's not gonna happen." Donnie said making everyone turn to look at him. "We won't let it. You're too good of a person to lose control and if you do then you're friends will be there to help you till you gain it back."

Xander was at first shocked to hear this come from the boy who possibly wants to kill him. Then he was greatful that Donnie was able to put aside his hate for him to try and reassure him. "You sound pretty sure about that."

"Well, you're _Scooby Gang _is full of good people who see the best in others. I mean, come on. You have a werewolf and a vampire as friends. I'm pretty sure no matter what you do they won't hold it against you."

"Who knew that under all that psychotic babble, beats a heart of gold?"

Donnie gave a small smile, the first one that Xander had seen directed towards him, "I'm only pointing out the facts that you obviously are too fucking stupid to see. Letting a dream make you feel insecure about yourself is like going to McDonalds for a salad. It's stupid and uncalled for."

"And once again the heart of gold is incased in a giant block of ice that will only melt every seven years." Xander replied while rolling his eyes and looking around at everyone. "I guess he kinda is right. I let the fear take control for a bit."

"Everyone is entitled to be scared every now and then. Hell, I'm scared most the time, but I overcome it with the fact that I have the power to make sure others aren't." Buffy said with a confident smile that was contagious, because Xander started smiling.

"Alright, enough of this sappy stuff. Let's get training!" He said as he threw the box of doughnuts down on the table. "I was at the Expresso Pump and got myself something to eat. I'm for some reason not hungry anymore."

"Never thought I'd hear the day." Oz finally spoke.

"My God. He talks." Xander said as he walked up to Oz and poked him in the arm before quickly pulling his hand back. "I thought he was broken." This earned him some laughs before he got serious again. "Did you meditate while I was MIA?"

"A little. It went better than last time." Oz answered as he cleared his throat.

"Yeah, because Willow's here." Buffy stated making the werewolf and Wicca blush.

"Well it's good he has a trigger." Emilia answered with a smile.

"Trigger?" Giles asked.

"Something…or someone that you think of, or focus on to maintain control. Sometimes it can take a person years before they find their trigger." She explained.

"Fascinating. And why is it important for their control?"

"It calms them faster. Or if they tap into their beast side they can think of their trigger and it gives them instant control. I still haven't understood that whole part, but from what Donnie's told me it helps."

"And what would Donnie's trigger be?" Willow asked from her spot on Oz's lap, where she moved to a few moments ago.

"My family." Donnie answered as he finished his homework and passed it down to Willow for her to check it. "Although if you want, you could be my trigger." He smiled sweetly at her.

"Sorry to say Little Dude, but she's spoken for." Oz said in his ever calm voice and winked at the younger werewolf.

Donnie just shrugged and spoke in the same voice, "No harm in trying."

"He's not only creepy but into older women." Xander mutter while rolling his eyes.

"Another thing you two have in common." Buffy whispered to Xander making his glare daggers at her.

"So if family is Donnie's trigger and Willow is Oz's, then what's yours Xander?" Angel asked actually wanting to know.

"I don't have one." He answered. Everyone looked at him with a bit of sympathy and he ignored them and decided to change the subject. "Buffy I bet you five bucks, I could have you pinned in under five minutes."

Buffy raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow and smiled at her Xander-shaped friend. "You are so on!"

* * *

"Oof!" Came the muffled response as Xander was thrown onto the floor and he cringed a bit when Buffy placed her foot on his chest.

"Pinned ya again." She said with triumph.

"Let's go again!" He demanded as he smacked her foot off in frustration.

"Xander, we've been at this for almost an hour, and you're already down 70 bucks. I almost feel like I'm taking money from a baby." She taunted him with a smile and waited for him to stand up.

"A baby would put up a better fight." Oz commented as he watched from his place on the steps.

"Shut it, wolf-meister!" Xander growled and Oz couldn't help but chuckle at the boy. "As soon as I have Buffy pinned all will be right in the world."

"Yeah, because pinning Buffy _once _would make you seem more of a man then getting pinned fourteen times." Donnie rolled his eyes and continued to do his homework.

"No one asked for your criticism!" Xander then turned to look at Buffy and he narrowed his eyes at her, "Five more bucks." He demanded.

Buffy just rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to speak, but was suddenly being knocked off her feet and landing on her back. Xander had dropped down and quickly kicked her off of her feet. Xander was then on top of her in an instant growling and sneering at her. "Congratulations, you caught me off guard….Xander, you can get off now."

Xander just continued to growl and sneer. Buffy could have easily overpowered him and thrown him off, but she was distracted by his eyes. She couldn't be certain, but she could have sworn they just turned yellow. Then in a flash he was gone. Angel had lifted him up by his shirt and glared at him. "She said to get off."

Xander just stared back at him and then looked back down at Buffy. He shook his head for a bit then reached out his hand to the Slayer. "S-sorry Buff. I tapped into the Hyena for a second. Didn't mean to let him out that long." He gave her a sheepish look.

"It's alright. I'm fine. It's good to know that you had enough control to not attack me after you had me pinned." She smiled at him and he just nodded. "Alright I'm exhausted. Time for a quick patrol. Who's game?"

"I have nothing better to do at 1:00am." Oz answered as he stood up, heading for the weapons.

"We could all patrol, it'll be fun." Willow eagerly followed behind her boyfriend and took the cross he had handed her.

"Yeah, I no longer have to hide behind tombstones when Buffy's fighting a vamp." Xander replied with a huge smile on his face. "Emilia, you should come along. You could work some magic mojo with Will, here."

"I'm not sure. I don't like using my magic to harm anyone dead or alive. It just seems to harmful to the user." Emilia answered as everyone seemed to move at once, doing different things.

"You can hang with Giles, all he ever does is read and criticize my slaying." Buffy answered with a overly bright smile which had Giles rolling his eyes.

"That isn't all that I do." Giles muttered as he put his coat on buttoned it.

"Right, you like to watch." Donnie said making everyone turn to look at him then to Giles, who was now blushing and had donned a horrified expression.

"I do no such thing!" Giles defended still looking horrified.

"If anyone is _watching _Buffy it's Angel." Xander said throwing the Watcher a life line.

"Thank you Xander."

"And I peep from time to time." Xander continued as if Giles hadn't spoken.

"On another note, I think I'll join you guys. See what the buzz is about." Emilia answered with a smile aimed at Xander which he returned.

"Great! Although I won't be present for the entire patrol."

"Why not?" Giles asked.

"It's Friday. Mom and Dad went out drinking. I wanna make sure I don't walk in on a homicide when I get back." He quickly answered not wanting to tell them of his real plans with Faith. "You guys understand right?" He gave a torn look and everyone assumed it was aimed at his unpleasant household, not knowing he was just upset because he had to lie to them yet again.

"Let's get going. Those vampire's aren't going to slay themselves." Buffy said as she grabbed Mr. Pointy and headed out the double doors. Everyone seemed eager to change the subject and quickly followed her out the door.

* * *

20 Vampires…That's how many vamps were in the group that decided to attack them. Xander had held his own and even prevented Giles from getting knocked out, which he was grateful for and even hugged him in thanks. They even got to witness Donnie turning into a wolf and take out a couple of vampires. Emilia and Willow had stuck together like glue and did a few small spells that stunned the vampires long enough for someone to stake them. All in all Xander had fun. Angel even complimented him.

Xander was thinking about the fight as he strolled towards Faith's room. He knocked on the door and smiled when she answered. "I don't like waiting."

"Well, you're going to have to live with disappointment. I was patrolling with the gang." He answered smoothly as he walked past her and sat down on her bed.

"You seem pretty confident that I'm going to sleep with you after you had me waiting." Faith smiled seductively at him and he just sighed. "Maybe I want you to work for it."

"I just finished patrolling. I'm tired of working. I want _you _to work. Now stop fucking around and get over here." He demanded his eyes flashing yellow again.

Faith was startled by his demand, but seemed to also be turned on by it. "I like a man who knows what he wants." She walked towards his and straddled him. "What do you want me to do?" She asked seductively in his ear.

He growled before turning quickly and placing her on the bed. "I want you to scream." He gripped her shoulders with more strength then she had expected and gasped in pain.

"Ow! Xander that hurts." When he didn't, she used her slayer strength to punch him off of her and in return he hit her back making her bleed. "That's how you want it?" She asked as she flipped him over and clawed at his chest.

"Always." He said as he gave her a rough kiss while pulling her hair.

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	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Short chapter again..Sorry. Hope you like it though.**

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Monday found Willow, Oz, Buffy, and Giles in the library talking about recent events. "They said the man had his throat torn out and he was eaten by a wild animal." Giles said as he summarized the passage in front of him. "The police suspect that a wild dog did is to blame."

"How many werewolf attacks are blamed on poor little doggies?" Buffy asked with a sad expression.

"It's the little ones you have to look out for. They bite." Oz commented with his usual expression.

"Still, dogs aren't the only evil things that go bump in the night." Buffy replied.

"Could a vampire have done it?" Willow asked as she took the paper from Giles and reread it.

"No. A vampire would have drained the man completely, this man was still bleeding when he was found. And he was attacked during the day." Giles answered, "He was found not far from here actually. They think he was attacked around 3:27pm, exactly the same time Xander was at the Expresso Pump."

The young adults looked at Giles as if he'd grown another head. "You can't think that Xander had something to do with this can you?" Willow asked with a horrified expression.

"Xander? No. The Hyena, yes." Giles answered with a wary expression. "Xander might not realize that he's done this. The binding spell that Emilia did might not have worked out as she hoped."

"What do you mean?" Willow asked a little confused.

"I read up on the spell she used and if done properly Xander could gain complete control over the Hyena. If done incorrectly…She could have given Xander a split personality. With Xander being one…."

"And the Hyena being the other." Oz finished. He knew how it felt to black out and not know what he had done only a few hours before.

"I think Xander would have remembered wiping off the blood." Buffy said trying to hold on to the hope that Xander didn't do this. "I mean Oz would have smelled the blood, right? I mean Angel most definitely smelled it, right?"

"You're right. I'm probably just being paranoid." Giles replied second guessing himself. "Has anyone seen Xander?"

"Not since Friday, but that doesn't mean he's been on a killing spree. It just means we haven't seen him." Willow said in a rush.

"Whoever Willow is talking about is completely guilty." Xander said as he breezed through the wide open double doors and smiled at his friends. "Who _is _Willow talking about?"

"You." Oz answered.

"Whatever _incident_ Willow is talking about I am completely innocent." He said with the same smile he had entered with. "What incident is Willow talking about?"

"A man was found with his throat torn out just a few blocks from here." Buffy answered this time.

"See it wasn't me. It was a vampire." His smile got bigger.

"It was during the day." Giles clarified.

Xander's smile faded a bit before he shook his head in faux sadness, "Donnie finally snapped. The little runt snuck out and killed someone while you guys were worrying about me."

Giles rolled his eyes and sighed in annoyance. "You're right Buffy, Xander didn't do it. The killer was smart, conning, evil, and blood thirsty. Xander isn't."

"Conning, evil, and blood thirsty?" Buffy asked

"Yes. That's what I meant." Giles said with a straight face as he walked into his office to grab a cup of tea.

"We don't think you did it. Giles did." Willow answered with a giant smile.

"Giles was concerned, that's all." Buffy defended her Watcher.

"Giles doesn't really count. He's always concerned. Remember when he thought Oz went on a killing spree?" Xander reminded with a smile.

"It very well could have been him!" Came Giles muffled reply. He was still in his office, but could hear them clearly.

"But it wasn't and you got all huffy for no reason." Xander countered in kind.

They then heard Giles mutter something that sounded like _"Bloody kids…" _But it was soon forgotten as Oz raised his hand to interrupt the friendly banter. "Um, Xander where have you been? We expected you at the Bronze, but you never showed."

Xander thought about how hid weekend went. His eyes flashing yellow as he thought about how he and Faith didn't get out of bed unless it was to use the bathroom. Three nights spent having sex with Faith wasn't exactly how he wanted to spend his weekend, but it satisfied the Hyena, so it was enough. "I spent the weekend in bed. Didn't really feel like getting up." He answered, it _was _the truth.

"Were you sick?" Willow asked with a worried expression.

"Nah, just tired." Also not a lie.

"Well you missed one hell of a weekend." Oz said.

"What's the what?"

"We spent Saturday at Emilia's house. Oz was able to spend more time interacting with his inner beasty." Buffy filled him and smiled at the slightly jealous face he was making. "Problem?"

"All of you guys went?" He asked as he threw a look towards the Watcher's office. When Buffy nodded he deflated a bit. "Anything important happened?"

"You mean between the meditating, eating, and laughing? Not really." Buffy answered and almost laughed out loud at the relieved expression Xander made.

"What about the kiss?" Willow asked before she thought about the question.

"Kiss?"

"Kiss? I didn't say kiss, I said list!" Willow tried to right her wrong, but Xander wasn't buying it.

"_Willlllllll._ You said kiss. Who kissed?"

Buffy glared at a regretful looking Willow. She tried to think of anything that could have been better than the truth, but before she could tell a complete lie, Giles had walked out with a blush creeping from his neck to his forehead. "_Giles _kissed someone? Holy shit! Who?" Xander said making the librarian blush harder.

"Emilia." Buffy muttered but Xander heard her clearly. She looked up to see the heartbroken expression on her friends face.

"She tripped and landed on his lips you mean, right?" he asked with a voice stronger than he expected it to be. When no one answered, he turned to Oz. "Oz, please tell me the truth."

"She walked right up and planted on one him. I've never seen a grown man blush so hard." Oz answered.

Xander was torn between two emotions. Sadness and anger. Sadness, because he liked Emilia and wanted to be the on kissing her at some point and anger at himself for introducing the two. He knew that if he gave into the sadness then he'd be at risk for the Hyena coming out to protect him. But if he gave into the anger it'd have the same effect. So he took a few deep breaths and smiled at the older man. "Way to go G-Man. Who knew you could land a hot lady like Emilia?"

The younger ones let out a nervous breath and just continued to stare at the pair. Giles on the other hand gave an embarrassed smile. "Xander, I know you have feelings for Emilia, and if you feel like you can't…deal with it. Please let me know."

'_Can't handle the competition?' _He thought, but said "Why?"

"I don't want to cause you any pain and if you want, I will not pursue her." By now Giles was no longer blushing. He was being completely honest.

"Don't." He answered sharply and Giles looked taken aback by his terse answer.

"Don't, what?"

"Don't pursue her." With that he stood and left the library.

* * *

"Xander, you should let Giles go out with Emilia." Willow said at lunch. Xander had been acting like he'd just won a million dollar by _not _letting Giles have a relationship.

"She's too young for him. He'll burn out in a week. I'm only looking out for him." He answered with a shrug.

"You didn't see his face after you left. He looked conflicted."

"Conflicted, Will?"

"Yeah. Like he was happy to not cause you pain, but torn because _you _caused _him _pain. I mean come on! The last relationship he had ended because…." She trailed off not really wanting to remember how his last relationship ended.

"Jenny died. Was murdered. By her boyfriend." Xander finished for her while pointing at Buffy. "I'm sorry to be so blunt, but it's what happened. I'm only trying to save her life. What if Angel turns evil again? Who's to say Emilia won't be on the list of things to kill next time?"

Buffy went from feeling guilty, to sad, to anger in a matter of seconds because Xander wouldn't stop talking. "He won't!" She defended her boyfriend because she knew the truth was that she and Angel wouldn't being having sex again.

"Hey, if he can't get it from you, then he'll get it from someone else." Everyone at the table gasped at that and stared at Xander in disbelief.

"That's kinda stretching it don't you think?" Oz answered with a glare in the younger man's direction.

"He's a vampire. You really think Buffy is his first love?"

"He has a soul!" Buffy practically screamed at him, making students turn in their direction.

Cordelia, who was standing only a few feet away from the group, rolled her eyes. "Can you take your little debate somewhere else? People are trying to eat."

"Cordelia please do the world a favor and shut the fuck up!" Xander said as his eyes flashed yellow again. It wasn't going to take long before the Hyena came out to play. "All you ever do is talk!"

"I'd rather be a taker then a cheater." She countered with a death glare at him.

"The only thing you're good at is spreading your legs, so why don't you go do that?" Everyone including teacher that where passing by looked both shocked and intrigued as to what Xander was saying. Cordelia on the other hand looked horrified and embarrassed. She tried to talk, but was cut off by Xander, "Please, don't talk! Your voice makes my dick shrivel into nothing." The Hyena was clawing at his chest and Xander couldn't hold him back any more….He gave in.

"Harris my office!" Snyder said from just a few feet away. Xander turned and slowly walked up to him making the shorter man step back.

"Or what?" He growled and then flashed his friends a smile. "I'll see you guys later." He then proceeded to leave school grounds.

* * *

"Just a few more days and he'll be mine." A man said as he looked across the street and watched Xander storm off. The man was hidden by the shadows that were being casted from the building next to him. He had been watching Xander since he first learned of the binding spell. For the first time in his life he's been able to fuse his to loves together. Possession and his hatred for the Slayer….

* * *

**"Push me!" Say's the review button!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: This particular series has been pushed to the back of my priority list for quite awhile now. I guess it was part of my 'not being able to finish anything' stint that up until recently has been consuming most of what I do. But, damn it, I need to finish this now. So, enjoy the update =) And please, be brutal**

* * *

A couple of days later found Xander laying on a park bench throwing peanuts in the air and catching them with his mouth. He was enjoying the peaceful quiet as he thought about what he was going to do, when someone knocked his feet off of the bench. "Hey!" Xander's head shot up and growled, before he knew who it was. "Oh, Emilia." He looked up at the older woman before offering her a seat.

"What are you doing here?" she asked as she sat next to him.

"Eating."

"It's ten in the morning."

"So?"

"On a school day."

Xander just shrugged. He hadn't been to school since he lost control. It wasn't that he felt bad for saying those things to Cordelia, cause he really wasn't, he just didn't want to put up with any of it any more. "Peanut?" He offered trying to change the subject.

"Buffy said you lost it." Emilia was giving him a look that told him she wanted to know what was going on, but he just ignored it. "Come on, Xander. You use to tell me everything."

"How's the gang doing?" He really didn't want to talk about this.

"Stop deflecting." Emilia sighed and leaned back on the bench. When he didn't answer she sighed, "Fine. The group is doing fine. They're worried about you. Especially Giles, he thinks it's his fault you had such a temper."

Fire burned inside of Xander at hearing the older man's name, but he kept it at bay. He didn't want Giles to be happy with the woman he had quickly falling for. '_Maybe you should let them be happy.' _A voice told him, he recognized it as his inner self, the self he used to be before the binding spell. "Heard you guys shared a kiss. Must have been nice."

Emilia frowned and placed her hand on his shoulder. "He told me you were jealous, but I didn't want to believe him. Listen, Xander. I'm flattered that you like me and all, but you're my friend."

"So what? Giles is your friend. You seem so high strung on getting a date with him."

"Yes, but Xander you're also younger than me. Not to mention you're still in high school."

"You're half Giles' age! Not to mention that the number one woman in his life is Buffy! Are you really going to compete with a Slayer!?"

"No, I'm not. The number one guy in my life is Donnie, so I'm not expecting Giles to try and compete for my attention."

Xander sighed heavily and stood up looking down at the woman he wasn't even sure he had a crush on any more. "Listen, Ok? Giles isn't good for you. His last girlfriend got possessed by a demon because of him then died. I'm not saying he's going to get you killed, but I am saying you could get hurt by being with him."

"Xander. Please, sit and calm down so we can talk."

Xander gave her an outrageous look, "You can't get someone mad and say calm down, that's like shooting someone in the foot and telling them not to bleed!" His eyes flashed yellow and he could feel the best clawing to escape, but he didn't let him….not yet anyway.

Emilia had seen his eyes and looked surprised and in a calm voice she asked, "Have you been meditating?"

"No. I'm in complete control, why would I need to waste my time doing that?" Now he was becoming irritated with her. Before he use to never have a temper, unless it had to do with Angel, but now he couldn't find a time when he wasn't angry at somebody.

"Xander, you _have _to meditate! It doesn't matter if you're in control or not. It sooths the beast in you, so it doesn't get irritated or angry for no reason."

By this time Xander wasn't listening any more. He was listening to something else. The Hyena inside of him. _"Looks like she wants to control _you_, do you really want that to happen? Isn't it bad enough that the Slayer wanted you on the sidelines when I was dormant? Or that the Wicca wanted you to go to _her _when you wanted the binding spell completed? Or that The Werewolf wants you to help him with his problems, the younger wolf wants you away from his sister, or that the Watcher wants you to accept him as a human and let him date said sister? Everyone wants you for something….Faith seems like our only friend. In more ways than one might I add…." _Xander smiled at that thought and looked at Emilia with a bored expression.

"I have somewhere to be are we done here?"

"What the hell is wrong with you Xander? Where could you possibly need to be at this time? Besides school?"

"I'm meeting a friend." He tried to brush her off, but she seemed to be pushing the subject.

"I know all your friends. They are either in school or hiding from the sun."

"Faith doesn't go to school and I can say with certainty that she doesn't hide from the sun. She sunbaths. We even bath together sometimes." He gave her a sexual grin as he walked away leaving her shocked and staring after him.

* * *

Xander walked towards Faith's room with a huge smile on his face. The beast in him wanted sex and he knew she'd deliver. He knocked on her door and waited for her to answer. When she didn't he turned the doorknob and was only half surprised to find it unlocked _'She really doesn't care for safety'_ He thought as he walked into her room. "Yo, Faith! You here?"

"Your sex partner is currently at the high school." A male voice said from behind him. As Xander turned to look at him he felt a prick in his neck and his world slowly started to become dark. "You on the other hand are coming with me."

* * *

Xander opened his eyes and looked around. _"Where am I? Why do I have such a bad headache?" _He thought as he slowly came to.

"Sorry, 'bout that. I really didn't want you to fight with me so I hand to knock you out." The male voice from before said, he was bleary, but Xander could tell he was Irish.

"Bad choice. I've got this thing with unidentified liquids being injected into me." Xander thought about that sentence for a second. "That came out so wrong."

"You're telling me." The man was now behind him and placed his hands on Xander's shoulders. "Any who. I don't want to hurt you."

Xander gave a snort and tried to move his hands, but found them to be tied. "Giving my current position, I find that hard to believe." The man just chuckled, in a very serial killer-like way that sent chills up Xander's spin. "Are you going to kill me?" His voice was soft, but was clear in the silent room.

"You? No. The Slayer on the other hand…" Xander's head snapped up and he growled at the man behind him. "My, my, aren't we testy. Given your current relationship with the _gang, _I thought you'd be happy to hear this."

The man sounded almost disappointed. Xander's head was starting to clear and he tried to turn around, but the man held his head firmly in place. "Just because my friends and I aren't agreeing at the moment, doesn't mean I don't care for them. And it certainly doesn't mean I'm going to let you kill Buffy!"

The man laughed as he watched Xander struggle against the chains around his writs. The room was dark, but it was clear to Xander that his kidnapper knew his way around. Leading the young man to believe he wasn't in Faith's hotel room any more. He needed to tap into his inner demon if he wanted to get out and warn his friends that a psycho killer was going to attack. He tried to concentrate on the Hyena struggling to get out, but instead of the creature taking over it seemed to calm down.

"Trying to get ahold of your… little friend? You might find him unresponsive." Xander could hear the smile in the man's voice.

"What did you do to me?" Xander asked in a low growl.

"I shut down your little problem. Isn't it what you wanted? For the Hyena to go away and everything else go back to normal?"

Xander stopped struggling and turned his head to the left and looked at the ground. Ever since he did that spell he had been doubting it and he he's been hating himself for it, but he couldn't seem to really care about that. He wanted everything to go back to normal, before he got the Hyena, but… he liked the not caring part… _'Why don't I care anymore?' _He asked himself as he slumped in the chair.

"You think too much child. It's very unbecoming. Besides, I've been told that you aren't the 'thinker' in the group. Wouldn't want you to hurt your little brain now would we?"

"Why tell me you plan on killing Buffy?" He suddenly asked and he could tell the man wasn't expecting that question because he was silent for a few seconds.

"Smarter then you look, Kid… I have a plan. _You _are the final piece I need to put in place for it to be finished."

"What do you mean? 'Final piece'?"

"_I'm _not going to kill your precious Buffy, _you _are."

The statement hung in the air as Xander absorbed what the mad man was saying. "….What? Why the hell would I kill her? I thought I was clear on wanting to kill _you._"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. You see my dear Alexander. I'm going to _make _you kill your best friend. Or more accurate, your Hyena kill her. As I clearly demonstrated on a few moments ago. I can control it better then you can."

Xander's eyes bugged out and he again tried to struggle out of his restraints. "You can't make me!"

"Boyo, I'm the bad guy. I can do whatever I want." The man then walked in front of Xander and the boy slowed his struggle as he identified the man. Professor Zackary Conner. Emilia's teacher.

"You? Why do you want the Buffy dead? She's Emilia's friend!"

"I only came to this dreaded country to excel in my profession. Dark Magic. I'm very powerful. I've seen and done things that would burn your insides. Then about a decade ago I met a young woman. Jennifer Calendar."

"You knew Jenny?"

"More than knew. We fell in love. We were engaged actually. Together six years, but she couldn't handle what my dark magic brought to the table. So she broke everything off. I tried everything to get her back, but the only think she wanted was for me to give up my powers. I could not." Zackary's eyes glazed over as he recalled all the memories. "Then after about two months of groveling she announces she's leaving! Coming here to Sunnydale, California."

"You want to kill Buffy because Jenny found us more reliable then you?" Xander interrupted with an annoyed look.

"SILENCE!" He yelled and Xander shut his mouth with a snap. "Before she left she told me that if I went cold turkey then she'd take me back. So I did. It took me three years before I was able to go a whole day without using magic. And instead of calling Jennifer up and telling her, I moved to here to Sunnydale. Got a job at the local college. Six months it took to get situated and feel like I was ready to ask for Jennifer's hand once again."

Xander did the math in his head and sighed and looked at the poor Irish man with sympathy, "That was almost two years ago."

"Imagine my surprise, when I find her at a stupid football game with that _Brit._" He rolled his eyes.

"So you're clearly not a fan of the G-man. So you're more likely to want to kill him, not the Buffster."

"I'm getting to that part. If you'd just shut up!" He rolled his eyes in annoyance. It was like talking to a five year old! "I confronted her a few days later and she told me she didn't feel the same for me anymore. Even gave me the ring back… I was extremely heartbroken, I gave up my life's work so that she could be happy and then she just blew me off! I holed myself up in my house for days before I decided to get over myself. I had waited too long to get her back. It was my own fault. Then she comes to me about a year and a half ago."

"Eyghon."

"Yes. She was distraught and scared. I wanted to kill Rupert Giles. But I didn't because I could see how much Jennifer clearly loved him. The way she spoke about him…" He fell silent and Xander could clearly read the pain on his face. "…I, uh… She convinced me to let him live. We had spent about a month together catching up. She told me about Buffy about you guys, and in return I told her about Emilia, Donnie and my work. Everything. Nothing was off limits. Then one day she tells me that she once again found herself with the Brit. So I made myself scarce. I went back to Ireland for a few months. And when I came back…"

"Jenny was dead." Xander whispered it and it hung between the two men. "Angel killed her. Not Buffy."

"You're wrong. Angelus killed her. Angel had lost his soul when Buffy decided to sleep with him. It's all on Buffy. No one else."

"Buffy didn't know what would happen! Jenny told us what happened to late. It's more her fault then Buffy's!"

"You can't blame a dead woman!" Zackary hollered. "She was my life! Now she'd gone because your precious Buffy couldn't keep her legs closed!"

Anger surged through Xander and he pulled at the chains. His eyes glowed a bright yellow as he desperately tried to open the cage containing the Hyena. But the lock was too difficult to break open. He wanted to cry out of pure frustration.

"Looks like you haven't found a trigger." Zackary mocked as he moved away from him. He walked to a staircase that Xander had just realized was there. "I'm going to leave you down here for a few days. You'll be much easier to possess once you're weaker. I'm sure no one would miss you. Especially since that scene you caused a few days ago. Sweet dreams, Boyo."

* * *

"So what you're saying is that he's not coming back?" Willow asked for what seemed like the hundredth time.

The entire gang, including Angel, Emilia, and Donnie sat in Buffy's living room planning on what to do with Xander. Joyce was walking around handing out cookies, drinks, and blood. Angel sat on the arm of Buffy's lone chair while Giles, Emilia, and Donnie took up the couch against the wall. Leaving Oz with the lazy boy and Willow seated on the were.

"There must be something we can do." Buffy said as she leaned into her boyfriend and crossed her arms. They had spent days and the better part of their Friday trying to come up with a way to get Xander back in school. Ever since his freak out, Cordelia had been avoiding them like the plague. Normally Buffy would be greatful, but the poor girl looked relieved when she didn't see Xander with them.

"Do you think it's my fault he's acting like this? I mean he was such a sweet boy, and even after the spell he seemed fine. Hell he seemed like the same old Xander Harris. Till he told you guys." Emilia said rambling from her seat.

Giles placed his arm over her shoulders and pulled her closer to him without thinking, "No, of course not. It's not your fault and we don't blame you. I went over everything you did. You did everything correctly."

"Coming from the man who accused her of doing it wrong." Willow added.

"It must be something else that we're not seeing." Giles continued as if the Wicca never spoke.

"You know if you want to find him we can just sniff him out." Donnie said in a bored tone.

"Sniff him out?" Joyce asked.

"Yeah, Angel, Oz, and I have heightened senses. We can find him if we wanted to. Bring him here, tie him up, reverse the spell, torcher him into the idea of my sister dating Mr. Giles."

Everyone just stared at the small boy and was creped out by the way he said that so calmly. "I'm a vampire and even that startled me."

"It's not that simple, Don. The spell can't be reversed. I made sure of it." Emilia said with a sight feeling even more guilty for doing such a stupid spell.

"We can always-"

"What's the what?!" Faith walked in with a giant smile interrupted Donnie and his mini psycho banter. "I went to the school and noticed that not one of you guys where there. Then I noticed that the curtains were closed and that could only mean one thing. Vampire boy was in the house."

"Can you not call me that?" Angel said with a sneer.

"Whatev. So what's up? You guys so bored you plotting the next apocalypse yourself?" She joked with a smile.

"Actually, we're talking about Xander."

Faith made a worried face, "Xan-man alright? He ain't hurt or nothing right? Cause when I saw him he looked fine."

"You saw Xander? When? Where?" Willow asked jumping up from her boyfriend's lap. "Was he OK?"

"I saw him this morning when he was leaving my place."

That just hung in the air….for a while. They had already talked to Faith about what Xander had said and the dark-haired Slayer confessed that she and Xander had been having regular…'training sessions' at her place. The gang was hurt that he hadn't told them and was lying about it, but furious that he had been hurting Faith the way he was during these 'training sessions'.

"Did you guys…?" Buffy let the question finish it's self because she really didn't want to know.

"No. He, uh, he wanted to know if you guys had informed me about what happened. When I said yeah, he grabbed my peanuts and turned tail. I wasn't sure what to do so I just let him go."

"Damn, why does he have to be so difficult?" Giles said as he pinched the bridge of his nose before running his hands through his hair.

"He's Xander. He's nothing but difficult." Willow said and everyone gave a small smile at her attempt at humor.

A sudden burst of the chorus from '_Basket case' _by Greenday made everyone jump. Emilia turned red as she fumbled in her pocket for her phone. She mumbled a sorry as she picked it up and walked away from the group. When she came back a few moments later, Faith had taken her spot and Buffy and Angel had moved so Joyce could sit. "It was my boss. He wants me at his place for some emergency. But you guys call me if you think of anything."

Everyone said their goodbyes as she and Donnie gathered their things and headed for the door. Giles even managed to give her a quick kiss on the cheek on her way out. Making the females in the gang 'Aww' and Donnie made puking noises. "I'll call you." Giles added making Willow and Buffy 'Aww' again.

* * *

Xander was starving. Plain and Simple. He wanted some grub, but Professor Conner wasn't listening to is screams of hunger. Or he couldn't hear him. Either way, no one was bringing him food. He was coming in and out of it due to lack of food. He closed his eyes, but found them too heavy to open… again.

'_You should sleep. Save your strength.' _The Hyena said. Xander realized a hour ago….or was it two hours ago, he didn't know how long ago…but he realized that his Hyena counterpart was able to talk to him like another person was living in is head.

'I can't sleep. What if he comes back down and decided to, like, water board me while I'm chained up?' He asked Hyena.

'_I doubt the guy, whose into dark magic, is going to water board you.'_

'The dude resulted to kidnapping. He could do whatever he wants. He's the bad guy remember?'

'_And we're the good guy. Well you are. I'm more like the good Hyena.'_

Xander snickered to himself. 'You know I'm not sure if it's cause I'm hungry and I'm just hearing voices. Or if this is real, but none the less you need a name.'

'_Cool. What are you gonna call me? The Hyena is getting kinda tiresome.'_

'Well do you want a pet name or a regular name?'

'_Dude, I'm you. Would you want a pet name?!'_

'You're right I'm sorry. How about Risus? Or Mimikos?'

'_Risus. The Latin word for Laughter? Mimikos. The Greek word for mimic. Someone was listening in language class.'_

'Sue me I like to speak sexy languages. Are you going to pick one or not?'

Just as he was going to get an answer he heard movement upstairs and the door to the creepy basement opened. Zackary walked down stairs with a small plate of food and took a chair and sat in front of Xander. "Mr. Harris I do believe you have figured out how to communicate with your inner beast."

Xander gave him a confused look, "How did you…?"

"Please. I'm a powerful sorcerer. I can practically read your mind. Risus or Mimikos? Cute. Which one did he pick?" Zackary asked as he feed him the sandwich.

"U en u on't know?" He asked around a mouth full of bologna and cheese.

"I said I can_ practically read your mind _not his_."_

'_Good, I can curse him out and he won't suspect a thing.' _That made Xander blow air out threw his nose as a quick laugh. "He hasn't decided yet."

"Alright. We are going to have guest over in a bit. If you scream I might have to kill her."

He gave Xander the last bite and he chewed slowly as he thought about screaming when his…kidnapper?...killer's? Guest arrived. "Who's coming over?"

"Emilia. So I'm begging you to scream. She's no longer fun to have around. Not since she became smitten with that damn Brit. Maybe once you're done with the Slayer. I'll have you go after the Watcher. Cause that'd be two women he's taken from me." The last part was whispered, but Xander heard him clearly.

'_He has a lot of problems doesn't he?'_

"Listen. I understand if you're in pain-"

"You understand nothing! You're just a child! I for one-" His rant was cut short once the doorbell rang. "Looks like our guest has arrived." He smiled down at his prisoner and walked up stairs.

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**A/N: Review please**


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